Since the day I heard about Arjun’s (my younger brother) accident, I started experiencing these bounding pulses in my heart where eventually my whole body moves. I only discovered last evening that when I stop my tears because I'm in a public place as it's not appropriate to breakdown, that's when my heart pounds and my whole body even my legs sway in a rhythm. When I try to control that movement is when my chest gets heavier and painful. So last evening when I sat down after a walk and I had a flash of a memory of my brother. I held back tears and my body began to sway. But since I was sitting facing a lake and there was a beautiful breeze, I allowed my body to complete that bounding pulse and oscillate, sway and move supporting the pulse instead of stopping it or going against it. My fear was that it may get worse and I may collapse but my training in #somaticwork tells me I need the body to complete that movement it is seeking. That it is just releasing deep sorrow.
I also need my body to feel safe and held. And no better support and co-regulation than Nature itself.